Monday, December 28, 2009

Pockets


Well pockets ... trouser pockets ... every wondered why they were made ? They were created for men damn it ! How dumb are ya ?
We men need those ... why do we need those ? For no reason .. yes that is the reason - "for no reason" When we have nothing to do what do we do ? We put our hands in our pockets .. What do we do in awkward situations and awkward pauses - we put our hands in our pockets.
When we dont know how to impress a girl - yeah you guessed it right, we put our hands in our pockets showing her how cool we are! How dumb can we get ?
Our jean pockets are our best friends. With those we face no fear, we are not afraid of the silence between conversations neither the crappy social small talk we need to do to sustain in this society of yours!
And all these days you were dumb enough to think that we have pockets to keep our things, cellphone, keys, blah blah blah...
And women have their hand-bags/purses whatever you want to call those (I never know at what size the purse qualifies to be called a hand-bag ... sorry unaware of the threshold size for the promotion :( .. ) to keep their stuff.
Seldom do you see a girl in need of her jean pockets to start a conversation or a small talk ...

I guess we men are too scared that sooner or latter we will show the finger during the conversation ... hence the need ... of pockets!

(image courtesy : http://www.weeklyreader.com/readandwriting/content/binary/pockets.jpeg)

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

No Tag No Fag

Girls have a deep desire to put a label on whatever they can. Like relationships .. their mind goes marking people, I bet thats what they use to distinguish people rather than the appearance. They live in the Avatar world where they see labels on the avatar's forehead. Closely notice them .. they go "guy with a long nose", "bald guy", "rich guy", "clooney look alike", "poor man's Shahrukh" ... then there are tags like "just a friend" which are more devastating than the break up. Its like you never got an entry into the team which feels worse than the team leaving you out for performance reasons.

Not only this opposite sex has to tag people, they are always in search of tags for things which are not yet tagged. In a relationship, what do you think a girl means when she says "where is this thing going .. ?" She wants an answer or rather a tag to put on it "committed" or "not committed" you bastard!

Why do only girls have a single "best friend" .. Please girls do let me know what exactly do you mean by "best friend". Is there a set of questions you ask yourself OR your so called "best friend" - answering which she is officially tagged as your best friend ? I want that questionnaire too for God's sake!
Guys never have a best friend. And if you find any guy mentioning that "best-friend" tag then the odds of him not being gay are equivalent to an Indian not knowing the significance of the name "Sachin".
Never saw a guy tagging someone as he is my best friend for life! Cause we dont tag :)
What is a "best friend" anyways ? Is he/she really the best ? These days I hear girls saying "she is ONE of my best friends ?" Superlative! I cant stop laughing on these kind..